Save Me Now
by PissyPoet
Summary: This is Dawn watching Buffy with jealosy, basically chewing her out for her faults mentally. I can't really find the words to explain this so just R&R. Rating for language
1. Chapter 1

Dear sister I don't think you quite understand. You have something. No you have everything. You're beautiful, strong, and loved. You have so many people who care about you, who would die for you and you still bitch and moan about the rough card you've been given.

I don't know you anymore. I realize that now as I stare at your ungrateful self bitch about how you have to save poor Dawnie from the newest big bad, how you don't have the time for my mistakes. You hate me, I know that, and don't get me wrong I don't really love you so much right now either.

You take it all for granted like you think it'll always be there. It being the cushion you fall back on when your imperfect existence becomes to much for you to handle. You don't see the way he looks at you, the way he inches closer to you as if to make sure to himself that he is in your presence.

You don't really know me anymore. I don't think you ever really did, after all I was always the annoying little sister you always had to save to make everyone else happy. And yourself, at least you used to just because I was the sister who looked up to you, followed your every action, said your words. You saved me because you liked the attention.

As I crept up to my room, quietly closed the door, turned on my music, and pulled out my blade I think to myself.

I'd like to see you save me this time.

§§§

Hmm reviews would be nice, I'm not sure if I want this to stay a one-shot or not. Depends on the reaction I get.


	2. Chapter 2

Another day another dollar. I hate that saying. Another day another fuck up is more like it. That's what I always do right? Screw everyone's life up with my annoying presence. They don't love me, I know that, I'm the thing that was thrown on their doorstep. I'm the thing who stole the life of someone who never existed, who didn't need to exist.

I like to numb the pain. Make it disappear, I'm not real, I don't deserve the perfect little life. I deserve this, all of this. The pain, the tears, the blood. I deserve to be hated for everything I've never done.

The perfects are out defending a world that has no meaning while I sit here in my pretty room. I don't like it. It reminds me of Buffy. Perfect looking but it's seen things you wouldn't believe, it's so perfect on the outside but on the inside it's an ungrateful selfish-okay I wasn't talking about the room anymore. My attention remained solely on Buffy and her perfection.

I walked over to my mirror and slowly undressed, scrutinizing every flaw I saw until I was just a piece of dirt. Never clean, always dirty, small and insignificant.

I was fat I realized. I squeezed the little bit of skin I had on my stomach, pulled, and glared at it. Disgusting.

I turned my arms outward and studied the scars marring once porcelain like skin. Only it wasn't porcelain because porcelain was for pretty things. Pretty people.

I reached up and grabbed the rats nest that I called hair. Well what other people call hair because I call it a nest, not hair.

I bent down, reached into my dresser drawer, and pulled out a pair of new black stockings. I smoothed them over my arms before taking scissors and cutting excess length off.

I reached down again and pulled out a pair of fishnet stockings, a semi-short skirt, and a black and white corset. I pulled these garments on, heard the door downstairs open, and felt the vibrations of someone pounding up the stairs. I knew what was going to happen.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Dawn? What are you doing? Come out." Xander's footsteps once again pounded down the stairs. I rolled my eyes and gave my door the finger. Not like it would do any good though.

Checking my clothes I grabbed my bag full of goodies and wrenched open my door before realizing I had no shoes on. I decided on shiny black boots. I like shiny, it reminds me of a Key.

I smirked internally as I saw Buffy's disgusted look at my outfit.

"And just where do you think you're going? We need to talk." I flicked my eyes over her beautiful outfit, still perfect even after a night of slaying and possibly fucking Spike.

"Out." Why talk to someone who doesn't want you to talk to them?

"Fine. I don't care anyways. I just wanted you to know there's another potential apocolypse." Goodie me! I have another chance to die.

"That's nice. Later." I wrenched open the front door and sprinted down the stairs as I heard Buffy's voice follow me.

"Try opening for once, not tearing!"

Bite me.

§§§

A/N Has anyone noticed how I have Dawn mocking Buffy but still thinking over her as perfect. As Marilyn Manson would say...The Beautiful People. Some people are jealous of them, but they mock them. Dawn is mocking Buffy in her perfection and hating her own imperfection, there's no middle. I don't think that really made any sense though...?


	3. Chapter 3

"If you could give me anything what would it be?" Dawn sat cross legged in front of him, cocking her head innocently while awaiting his answer.

"If I could give you anything," His voice trailed of and when he spoke again it was with a slight Irish lilt, "If I could give you anything, I would give you warmth. Warmth so that whenever I grab your hand you're not cold. I wouldn't give you happiness because that would fade. I wouldn't give you the world because it's over rated. I would give you warmth though, just because it's the feeling you get when you're being embraced by someone who really cares."

Gasping for breath I awoke from a very odd, very common dream.

§§§

"Dawnie get ready for school!"Buffy's annoyingly close voice screamed through the house. Rolling over I muttered a soft "Right," and got into my choice of clothing for that day.

Grabbing a pair of tight black jeans I slid into them not so gracefully while wondering who the strange boy in the dream was.

Getting a gray tank top that matched the color of the sky, I thought about how he reminded me of Angel in some ways. He seemed noble and like he knew a lot about the world, about life. He seemed like he had experienced a lot of things, but wasn't Mr. Broody like Angel.

Shaking my head I grabbed a black sweater, my shiny key boots, and walked down stairs, pulling my sweater on as I went.

"Later," I whispered knowing no one would care if I said it any louder.

Walking down the path I prepared for another day at my second Hell.

§§§

"She really is perfect," He thought to himself as he followed her slow walking form down the road, smiling as he whispered, "Perfect."

§§§

Short chappie I know but I thought i should update seeing as I havent updated in a while...review pwease! Ohh and I decided to cut down on the self hatred for this chappie more of a...general hatred of everything. Not to obvious either so thats a plus I guess...


	4. Chapter 4

"Dawnie, we need to have a talk," I knew this wasn't goin' to be a good thing by the look on her face. It was one of false love. Great, just great.

I put a big fake smile on and sat down perkily on the couch, staring at her like she was a goddess. Yeah right.

"There have been a few words getting back to me, as the guidance counselor, that you're doing bad things Dawnie. They tell me you've been having sex, and doing drugs? Is this true Dawn?" Her eyes no longer portrayed fake love, it was now hate and scorn. Again with the great theory.

"No it's not true, I mean why would I wanna do _those_ people? I mean come on."

"Dawn I don't like your attitude, I don't think you're giving me the proper respect. I let you stay here when we found out you weren't even blood, don't you think I earned some respect?"

This is where another voice promptly cut in, thus shocking Buffy and I.

"No I think you deserve to have your head torn off but that's besides the point isn't it?

Oh. My. God. He was beautiful. He had the blackest of black hair with wonderful gray eyes. They looked as though they held the secrets of the world. He was not tall but not exactly short either, he was wearing black denim jeans with a white wife-beater, and a leather duster, not unlike Spike's, thrown over it.

"Lemme guess," Buffy's nasally voice interrupted my thoughts, "You're one of this whore's customers?"

She just called me a whore! I can't believe that little slut. _Her_ of all people called _me_ a whore. What and the hell is wrong with her dyed blonde self?

"Excuse me? Did you just call me a whore? You the queen of slutness called me a whore?" Her pretty pink lips formed a silent 'Oh' while she looked at me with nothing but contempt in her eyes.

"That's it Dawn Stephanie, I've tried to be nice but you just won't cooperate! You can no longer live here, I'm sorry, well no I'm not but that's besides the point." She pointed her finger at the door and yelled "Out!"

"Fine, later, or not. Slut!"

§§§

Urgh the nerve of her! Walking down the street to the closet bus stop I finally realized I had no money, no clothes, my 'sister' just kicked me out, and there were footsteps behind me this entire time.

"Look here budd-"Oops? It was the guy who interrupted Buffy's calm talk. "Sorry, thanks for well I don't know, but thanks."

He stared at me confused, probably wondering why I was thanking him. Before smiling a smile so amazing it made me weak in the knees. What the hell, is this some book or something? I mean it wasn't even a 'perfect' smile you know? He didn't have blindingly white, straight teeth, but he just did something with his eyes that made you _think_ it was perfect.

"Who are you anyways?" He seemed lost for a moment before answering.

"I don't know who I am, no one knows who they are really. You can call me Blaze though."

"Blaze. I like it, makes me think warm." He did that little grin again before nodding in agreement.

"Yeah, warmth."

§§§

A/N Sooo what did ya'll think yay or nay?


End file.
